March 17, 2014

April is Not the Cruelest Month

Posted in Uncategorized at 9:08 pm by Rev. Thomas Perchlik

Minister’s Column – April 2014

I now serve in the First Unitarian Church of Saint Louis. In 1922 a child of our church, who had grown into a significant adult poet, wrote:

April is the cruelest month, breeding
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
Memory and desire, stirring
Dull roots with spring rain.

These lines, the beginning of T.S. Eliot’s Wasteland, capture the ambivalence of this month. Always it is a mixture of ice and heat, sprouts and snow. The point, I think he meant to say, is not that April is cruel but that all life is a difficult mixture. The poem as a whole speaks to the uncertain inconsistency of human existence.

In my last year of high school, I stood with some UU youth looking at a particularly lovely sunset. The colors, twilight blue, saffron and electric orange, layers of black and yellow, all moved me. I said that it seemed as though I had lived my life just for the chance to be part of that beauty and peace. A good friend of mine scoffed and said “That is ridiculous.” I realized then, though I was content and looking toward college, he was not sure he could even endure another month with his abusive father and alcoholic mother. As I saw the poignant beauty of life in balance, he saw life tipping toward the fearful darkness and cold of winter. Seeing the change in my face, he said, “You don’t need me as a friend. I will just pull you down.” Although I could not find the words to say it, I knew I needed him. I realized how he deepened my happiness. He made my joy in life saner and more grounded. I hoped my friendship helped him also, to see something beyond his own circumstances into the larger circles of hope.

This is how it is. While some look forward to blossoms and new life rising in Saint Louis, like people in most cities, we know there are also bullets planted in guns that will end someone’s life this spring. While some are facing homelessness and endings, others are riding the slow wave of a growing economy. That is why the UU church exists, to bring us all together in community in order to find true beauty beyond mere prettiness.

So may it be, that we find with each other, a rich and poignant and fearsome wholeness. Or, as the poet William Blake wrote several hundred years ago, “Joy and woe are woven fine, A clothing for the soul divine…”

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